Let the breathing treatments begin...

Sigh...we didn't make it too far before illness fell on us again! After a super fussy day Monday and a lingering cough that he's had for a few weeks now, Asher came down with a fever yesterday afternoon which rapidly turned into raspy breathing, wheezing and crazy coughing spells. After a very restless night last night, I called the doctor and they asked us to come in. So after a long visit at the pediatrician's office, they sent us home with strict orders to give breathing treatments every four hours for the next few days. Awesome huh?! Thankfully, Asher seems to enjoy the breathing treatments. He sits very quietly for them and if you ask him afterward to tell you about the treatments, he covers his mouth with his hands like he's putting on his mask, blows out lots of air and starts babbling away as he's trying to explain the process. Very cute!

So let me pause for a moment and say that it's been a long, hard season for me. Asher has been sick, almost continuously for the past 4 months...in fact I counted in my head the other day that he has been well for all of about 3 weeks since he turned one. And for all you Mommies that know, sick kids mean crying, crying, crying, sleepless naps, no appetite, restless nights and ENDLESS bouts of fussing. And then on top of that, add in a needy 3 year old who has suddenly decided that backtalk, attitude, aggression toward his younger brother and unkind words used on a regular basis are all appropriate ways to communicate and treat his family. All I know is that this Momma is worn thin these days. It's been hard...really, really hard! And I pray that this season (yes, I realize this is a season) will end soon, but I realize more then ever that God is molding me and refining me as I walk through some tough days. I realized just the other day, after yet another really frustrating, long day where all I did was pace and attempt to pacify a crying baby and CONSTANTLY yell at a little boy who seemed determined to beat me, that I had never realized my weakness as a human, as a mother, as a wife to the degree that I do now that I have kids. And by weakness, I mean that I have never needed Christ to make me whole and to rescue me from my continuous sinful nature like I do now. I keep failing and He keeps picking me up, showing me grace and giving me the courage to start again. As we stepped out of the car today to go get Asher's prescription for his breathing treatments, Braden looked at me and said, "Momma, I'm cold." Then without skipping a breath, he looked to the sky, folded his hands and said "Dear Jesus, please give us warm weather. Amen." His sweet, innocent, simple prayer brought such joy to my heart. Childlike faith is beautiful...truly beautiful! Children have a longing in their heart and they just ask. I found myself thinking today that I too need to look to the sky and expose my heart to the One who really cares. I mean, sure I pray all throughout the day but do I really stop, pour out my heart, expose my weakness and plead God for help to change the things that I cannot? For I am weak without Him.

One tired Momma, holding a sick, feverish little boy -